Young Jews don’t take their identity for granted

I HAVE some bad news and some good news. Actually, it is bad news that is really good news. The bad news: young Jews do not take Jewish identity for granted anymore.

This is not a news flash for anyone trying to work with Jews in their 20s and 30s. They simply do not engage with the traditional Jewish institutions – the synagogue, federation, JCC – in ways that were once assumed to be automatic.

Worse: to the extent that young Jews always took a break from Jewish organizations, today’s young Jews remain off the Jewish institutional grid for much longer than in the past. This is because of one main reason: they are getting married later and having children later.

Steven M. Cohen, the leading Jewish sociologist, is fond of saying that Jews affiliate when they give birth to a 7-year old child. In other words, when parents are looking for schooling for their children, they finally start to look at traditional Jewish institutions – schools and synagogues. But while people used to do that in their mid- to late-20s, now they are doing that in their mid-30s or early 40s. The result: Jews shun Jewish institutions for 20-25 years before re-engaging (if they re-engage at all).

There are two major ways to look at this problem. One is to bemoan the demographic consequences: Jews unengaged from Jewish institutions are less likely to marry Jews or raise Jewish children. The ever-dying people continues to die – but this time for real!

The second, less common way to view this problem, is from the perspective of Jewish life for those who are bought in. Fewer Jews engaged in Jewish life leads to a poorer expression of that Jewish life. Absent are the contributions of perhaps the most energetic age demographic: adults without children. Whichever lens you choose, this disengagement is bad news.

Now for the good news: Young Jews do not take Jewish identity for granted anymore.

Why is this good news? Because people are looking to engage with Judaism on a deeper level, and hoping it can speak to their most pressing questions: why am I here? What is the meaning of life? What is the good life? How can I be a better person?

This is not a Judaism in which people join a synagogue or a JCC because “that’s what Jews do.” It is one in which Judaism competes with myriad systems of meaning out there on the free market.

The advantage Judaism has in this battle for people’s hearts is that it has been around for a long time and has collected timeless wisdom along the way. This wisdom is expressed in sacred texts, systems of behavior (mitzvot) and liturgy. These are not pat answers to the deep questions, but nuanced, complex ways of looking at human existence.

The problem is this: access to that wisdom is very difficult. For men willing to learn in a single-sex environment, the access is attainable through yeshivot, both in America and in Israel. But for those who are unwilling to compromise their modern understanding of gender roles – most American Jews – the choices are shockingly slim. One can either choose from a limited few options in Jerusalem, or one can go to rabbinical school. In other words, opportunities to engage with Torahlishmah – learning for its own sake – in an intensive environment are severely limited in the United States.

This reality has stymied hundreds, if not thousands, of Jews simply looking to become empowered in the traditions and practices of their faith. The larger Jewish community suffers for the loss of these would-be empowered and educated Jews.

Changing this reality has animated my life for the past seven years. In 2001, I helped start a lay-led minyan called Kehilat Hadar (www.kehilathadar.org), which has attracted thousands of young Jews and led to spin-off minyanim across the country. And in 2006, I co-founded Mechon Hadar (www.mechonhadar.org), whose cornerstone project – Yeshivat Hadar – offers an intensive, immersive Jewish study community – the first egalitarian yeshiva of its kind in the United States.

As reported in The Voice & Herald in its May 16 edition (“Rabbi Elie Kaunfer wins Jewish ‘genius’ award”), I was recently awarded the Avi Chai Fellowship to advance this work. I intend to use that grant as the seed (more money must be raised) to open a year-round component to Yeshivat Hadar, which meets now in the summers only. This is hard work: we are competing for students who are looking for prestigious fellowships, summer internships, or other resume-building activities.

But I have seen the results of students who become empowered in their Judaism through engagement with texts. They own their identity in a substantive manner, and they return to their communities with the passion and the skills to contribute. They don’t join to join, they don’t join out of guilt. They join and contribute because they understand the power of Torah and mitzvot in a deep way.

Young Jews do not take Jewish identity for granted anymore. If we can offer them ways to engage and become empowered in their heritage, then that is very good news.

Rabbi Elie Kaunfer, a Providence native, is the co-founder and executive director of Mechon Hadar. He is speaking June 1 at the tribute to his father, Rabbi Alvan Kaunfer, at Temple Emanu-El.